


Not Today, Mr. Potter

by Drarry_Quite_Contrary



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst, Bisexual Harry Potter, Bisexual Severus Snape, Book 1: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, Book 2: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Book 3: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Book 7: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Canon Compliant, Hogwarts, Hogwarts Era, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentor Severus Snape, Minor Lily Evans Potter/Severus Snape, Oblivious Harry Potter, On Hiatus, Podfic Welcome, Possessive Behavior, Protective Severus Snape, Protectiveness, Secrets, Severus Snape Lives, Soul Bond, Soulmates, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, do not post on other sites
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:00:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27250849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drarry_Quite_Contrary/pseuds/Drarry_Quite_Contrary
Summary: Severus had many regrets. He had sacrificed himself once for love, and he could do so again. Even if it destroyed him.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Severus Snape, Lily Evans Potter/Severus Snape
Kudos: 22





	Not Today, Mr. Potter

**Author's Note:**

> ***All characters created and owned by J.K. Rowling***

A tall, cloaked figure made its way down the cobblestone street.

A thin pale hand pushed open the small ironwork fence and walked along the path to the front door. 

It was a risk to come. He had told Dumbledore he didn’t want them to know. One last time. It could be the last time.

There was laughter ringing behind the door of the cottage. He knocked three times. Would she come? She may not answer. _He_ could come instead. What then?

The sound of light footsteps approached. The door opened to find a smiling young woman with brilliant green eyes and long flowing red hair. Her smile faltered.

“Sev?”

“Hello, Lily.”

Lily stepped outside and closed the door swiftly behind her. “What are you _doing_ here? How could you...you have to leave,” she said sternly.

Severus lowered his hood, his features laced with agony. “I’m sorry. I had to come.”

“Why? After all this time. After all you’ve _done!_ Why shouldn’t I call for James right now? For Dumbledore!”

“I cannot explain why, but you have to trust me.”

Lily crossed her arms, turning her head away furiously. “Trust you? How can I.”

“For the sake of our friendship. The one we had. The boy you knew...and loved,” said Severus soothingly. 

Lily’s eyes softened at his words. She turned toward him, still clutching herself as pain washed across her face. The moonlight gleamed in her tear-filled eyes.

“It’s been nearly five years, Sev. Five years since we’ve spoken a single word to one another. You chose your way. I chose mine.”

“I was a fool!” he growled and grabbed her shaking hand. “I loved you, Lily. You cast me away, and I shouldn’t have let you!”

“ _I_ cast you away? You made it very clear that I was nothing more than _mudblood_ trash to you.”

“You’re wrong! I never, I would never. They were the ones…”

“Ah yes, and here we are once again. _Them._ You chose _them,_ Sev.” Tears poured down Lily’s face.

Severus put a reluctant hand on her arm. “I convinced myself that you were better off without me, no matter how much I loved...love you.”

“A choice you made all on your own!” Tears poured down Lily’s face. “Why, Sev,” she sobbed. “Why now? I have a life. James…Harry. It’s too late for any of this.”

“I know. I know. I’m here because I know that you will be going into hiding,” he said.

Lily’s eyes widened. “How do you…?”

“Forget how I know. And _no,_ the Dark Lord does not know. Nor will he know. Use a secret keeper. Someone you trust above all else. You must, Lily. Promise me you will,” begged Severus. 

Lily stared into Severus’s black eyes, pleading and filled with remorse. “Yes. We will.”

Severus took one small step toward Lily and brushed a tear from her cheek. “I know that it changes nothing.” 

Her breath hitched. He leaned in toward her but thought better of it. He was a monster for even thinking such a thing could remain between them.

Then Lily kissed him. A gentle brush of the lips. She raised a hand and placed the tips of her fingers on Severus’s cheek, now streaked with tears.

Abruptly, at the sound of footsteps approaching, he pulled away. He stroked her cheek one last time. “Hide. Please. All of you.”

The door creaked open, and Lily spun around to face her husband, his face filled with concern. When she turned back, Severus was gone.

* * *

“No. _No!_ You were supposed to protect them. They were to be kept safe! I _begged_ you!” 

Severus slammed his hand into the ornate mirror on display in Dumbledore’s office. It shattered, leaving his hand mutilated. Blood dripped onto the floor as he fell to his knees.

“They chose to put their faith in the wrong person. It is unfortunate, but it is the truth. There is no changing it,” said Dumbledore calmly.

“She’s dead. She’s…gone.”

“She may be gone, but her memory lives in her son, Harry.”

“That boy is _nothing_ to me! He should have died instead. He was the one the Dark Lord wanted!”

“If you loved her, truly loved her, you must cherish her memory and look after her son.”

Severus looked at his hands, tears falling to the floor. 

“How can I,” he whispered.

“In ten years, he will attend Hogwarts. For the time being, he will be safe in the care of Lily’s sister and her family. The blood they share will protect him from harm. When he leaves them, however, he will be vulnerable. I leave him in your care, Severus.”

“Leave me,” begged Severus.

“As you wish.”

Dumbledore glided toward the door. When he grasped it, he gave Severus one last sympathetic look. “If only you knew what that boy will mean to you.”

Then Severus was alone.

* * *

**10 Years Later**

Severus busied himself, organizing and refilling his potions stores. He reorganized all the work-stations in the classroom. Three times. Then four. The floors were shining, not a speck of dust on any surface. He had to keep busy. With anything. Anything to keep him from remembering.

“I believe you are quite ready for term now, Severus,” said Dumbledore as he strode into the potions classroom.

“Apologies, but I do not desire your company, Albus,” sneered Severus.

“Oh, come now, Severus. He is only a boy.”

“Only a _boy?_ A boy whose parents are dead at my hands. A boy that the woman I loved and that... _Potter_ sired together. I’m sure he looks just like his father: smug, cocky, wild-haired, scrawny, arrogant…”

“You haven’t even met the boy, Severus.”

Severus’s hands started to tremble. “You said he would be my responsibility. What if I don’t _want_ it. I don’t want _him.”_

“I believe you will soon see that you will be unable to do anything but take that responsibility. Now, if you are quite finished, we must head to the Great Hall. The students will be arriving shortly.”

Severus raked his slender fingers through his long, oily black hair. “Fine.” He straightened his robes and followed Dumbledore out the door.

* * *

Severus took his customary seat at the Staff Table. Robes rustled, and Quirrell sat down beside him. 

“S-S-Severus. Have a lovely holiday?”

He glared at Quirrell, who recoiled back into his seat.

The Second through Seventh Years had already taken their seats at the House Tables. Soon Minerva would arrive with the First Years.

Severus stiffened as the oak doors rumbled and creaked open to nearly 50 small children in crisp, clean robes, wide-eyed and awestruck as they entered the Great Hall. He searched the group furiously. Which one could he be? He noticed a boy with Lily’s red hair, but it was only another Weasley. The boy beside him, though. He was small and could not be adequately seen within the crowded group, but Severus knew that hair. That messy, thick black hair that could only belong to James Potter’s son.

Minerva began the sorting ceremony. Severus collected an assortment of new Slytherins, including the young Draco Malfoy. He had known his father, Lucius, since his own time at Hogwarts. Then, the time came.

“Potter, Harry.”

Sitting on the edge of his seat, Severus held his breath as a small boy climbed onto the dais and sat on the stool. He was short and gangly. A bit awkward, perhaps. Then he inspected the boy’s face. Though he favored his father in many ways, his eyes and lips were the same shape and color as Lily’s. Brilliant green eyes sparked nervously as the boy set his sights upon the Staff table.

Severus’s breath hitched. Something shifted in his gut, his chest. Was he having a stroke? A heart attack? He didn’t feel...normal. The boy sat there for several minutes. The Sorting Hat appeared to be struggling with him.

_Not Slytherin,_ thought Severus, panicking. He couldn’t bear to be around the boy. His insides were being torn apart. Was this loathing he felt? That didn’t seem right. Surely he hated the boy. He was the spitting image of James Bloody Potter. 

“ _Gryffindor!”_

Severus’s chest clenched tighter as if this response was agony instead of relief. _Well then. That is done._

As they ate their dinner, Quirrell intended to coax Severus into a conversation. Anything to distract him from the pain throbbing in his body as he stared at the profile of Harry Potter, laughing and smiling at his new friends at the Gryffindor table.

“S-so, you see. Albania is home to all s-sorts of unique creatures,” said Quirrell.

Snape was barely listening, though he nodded occasionally. 

Then something indescribable happened. Harry turned toward the Staff table and stared directly into Severus’s dark eyes. The brilliant emerald green eyes that haunted Severus’s dreams. His mouth went dry. Something snapped into place within him.

> _“If only you knew what that boy will mean to you.”_

His face contorted into a snarl, and Harry turned away immediately.

“No. Absolutely not.”

“What was th-that?” asked Quirrell.

Severus rose from his chair and stormed toward the door. He could have sworn he saw Dumbledore’s eyes twinkle as his lips curled into a soft, knowing smile.

* * *

Severus paced his quarters, exasperated.

“What the bloody. Fuck!”

It was impossible. Lily. _Lily_ had always been the one. Always. He knew it to be true. Life had just gotten in the way. But if not Lily...her _son?_ The boy was eleven! What a cruel trick of fate. Merlin was laughing down at him, cursing his poor lonely existence with an eleven-year-old boy. 

“Just forget it. Just because it is so does not mean it shall be. Yes. I won’t _do_ anything.” 

He despised the boy—the control he had over him. Severus would not let fate win.

* * *

“You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potion-making. There will be no foolish wand-waving in _this_ class,” hissed Severus as he glared down at his new First Year students. “I don’t expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses...I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death — if you aren’t as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.”

His eyes landed on Harry, and his nostrils flared. “Ah, yes,” he sneered, “Harry Potter. Our new — _celebrity_.” He could smell the boy. Grass, soap, and...marmalade?

“Potter!” he snarled, “What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?” His lips quirked at the sight of the boy’s blank, gawking expression. “You don’t know? Then where would one find a bezoar? No?”

The bushy brown-haired girl next to Harry was waving her hand furiously in the air, but he did not break his stare from Harry’s.

“And what is the difference between monkshood and wolfsbane?”

“I don’t know,” said Harry quietly. “I think Hermione does, though,” pointing to the leaping girl beside him.

Severus gave the girl an impatient sneer. Her hand dropped immediately. His eyes snapped back to Harry. 

“For your information, Potter, asphodel, and wormwood make a sleeping potion so powerful it is known as the Draught of Living Death. A bezoar is a stone taken from the stomach of a goat, and it will save you from most poisons. As for monkshood and wolfsbane, they are the same plant, which also goes by the name of aconite. Well? Why aren’t you all copying that down?”

Harry’s cheeks reddened with anger or embarrassment, Severus did not know, but it pleased him just the same. He could do it. He would survive this child with pure loathing.

As his lecture continued, he managed to call out to Harry on several occasions to his obvious discomfort. The more he made the boy squirm, the happier it made him. Happy? No. Relieved. 

When the class was over, and all the students had gone, Severus slumped into his chair and released a deep breath. His body was aching; his head was pounding. What was wrong with him?

Would he have to expend this much energy around the boy? If, after one day, he was completely wrecked, how could he possibly survive the term? Not just the term...

This would be the most painful seven years of his life. More painful than his years serving the Dark Lord. He was absolutely fucked.

**Author's Note:**

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